Weeks before my mom knew she was pregnant with Lincoln, I knew. I remember looking at moms reflection in our full length bathroom mirror thinking about how her tummy seemed slightly 'poofy' and as she fixed her hair she hummed a song. Something seemed different about mom and when I asked her if she was pregnant she giggled, 'what made you ask that?' She stopped for a brief moment, in thought, then carried on humming. On Christmas day that year mom and dad announced that we had one more gift but we couldn't 'open' it quite yet. The suspense ate me alive as mom smiled and built up to say, 'we are having a baby!' My mouth dropped open and I exclaimed, 'I knew it!!' Every single day from December to July I prayed that mom was having a girl. I already had two brothers and I thought that was enough!
As dad and I paced the hallway in the hospital for the baby status update we teased each other even making bets on if baby was gonna be a 'Tiffany' or a 'Lincoln.' The doctor emerged from the room (from which seemed like an eternity) and announced, 'it's a... boy!' My heart sank as I looked at shiny speckled linoleum floor and thought to myself..... but Tiffany was gonna play dress-up with me!!! As I walked into the room the doctor handed my baby brother to me. Before dad or mom or any other family member got to hold Lincoln I got to be first. As my arm supported his head close to my heart he opened his eyes to greet me and I said, 'Why hello there.... it's nice to meet you, Lincoln.' He was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen and at that very moment I forgot about combing barbies hair, rainbow bright and 'girls only' tea parties. At that very moment I knew that I was in love. Then dad whispered to me, 'just think Sarah, when your about to turn thirty, Lincoln will be graduating from high school.' ........'ohhhh dad, that's soooo far from now!' Dad chuckled knowing time better than I did. I looked over at a very exhausted mom and in her eyes I saw the same lovely expression as the day she was humming to herself in the bathroom.
Needless to say, I have always felt a special bond with Lincoln. When we weren't together I would wonder if he was hungry, if he had toys to play with at home, did he have his nap yet? I have had eighteen years of worry thinking about what choices Lincoln will or won't make in his life. When I moved to New Zealand for several years, I missed my entire family but I found myself missing him the most. After two years of being gone, I returned to NM for a visit and as I walked through the airport my hand was suddenly filled with a small warm hand. I looked down at Lincoln and he said to me, 'sister you are..... beautiful.' I replied, 'And look at you Lincoln! You're so tall now and looking very handsome!' Hand in hand we walked towards the airport parking lot the entire time thinking to myself, 'Now I'm home.'
Baby brother Lincoln,
You are the best surprise I have ever received.
Happy 18th birthday!
Love, sister
Also, my husband has asked me not to make a big deal about his 30th birthday today or else I would have written about him too....I am trying to honor his request but I can't go without at least saying: Happy birthday sweet David! See, I told you that you would make it!!! :o)
8 comments:
Wow! Incredible Sarah. You're both very lucky.
Happy 18th birthday Lincoln! How cute are you!? It seems like yesterday that Sarah and I were picking you up from Kindergarten! I have pictures of you, Sarah and I when you were like, seriously, 5 years old! I will never forget when you were that age and wanted to follow us around everywhere and not let us be teenagers! But my favorite memory of you is when we went to pick you up from Kinder and you told the teacher we weren't allowed to pick you up because we were "lesbians"! Don't know where that came from, but it still makes me smile! You've grown up to be a wonderful person! Good luck in everything you do!! oh and by the way, you were a great student aide...until you taped all the desks to all the chairs! LOL ;o)
There must be magic in play here. Lil Lincoln, pensive and sweet, has been lost to adolescence. To Oujia boards and vehicular assault. But whenever I see him I always think of the "pimp-squeak" who told his sister that she was the most beautiful "grill in the werld".
You forgot, Sarah, about relativity.
so beautiful!
Happy Birthday Lincoln!!!
and
Happy Birthday David!!!
have fun celebrating YOU!
Wow, 18 already! My favorite memory of you is that one winter day when it really snowed a good one and you, Sarah, my sister and I all walked to Jeanne Bellamah Park and had one massive snowball fight! We also had sleds and rode the hill a few times! That was a great day! You are no longer that sweet little boy...your better, you have turned into a Wonderful Handsome young man!!!! Happy Birthday Lincoln! Love Sara (M)
oh I almost forgot the ouija board thing...sorry about that!! me, sarah and david were bad!!!
Sarah must have forgotten that the Doctor asked if she wanted to go in the operating room to see the baby born. She wanted to go in but since I had to have a C-section I thought that wasn't a good idea after all she was only 11 and also thought that might tramatize her from having her own children. But I should have known better about Sarah having children after all she was 5 when she let us know she didn't think she would have children because she didn't feel motherly instincted and besides there are so many children to be adopted. That is exactly what she told her husband before they were married in New Zealand in the most beautiful fun wedding anyone could ever want. But back to Lincoln and Sarah they have been close siblings, Lincoln became Sarahs god child when she was 12. They run together, laugh and do crazy things for example did any of you blogging ever see the fotobug on the road with toothbrushes on suction cups stuck to the windows and at every stop light they would bob their heads against the bristles and brush their teeth? Passerbyers laughed so hard. Lincoln is one of my loves I can't believe how you've grown, such a good guy and always handsome. Love you always!
As for David my one and only favorite son in law. You are the nicest person one could ever ask for to have as a family member. I have never told anybody this but I have twin sons, well not identical at all, not the same age, but born on the same day and they adore each other. To my sons, Happy birthday Lincoln and David! Love you lots.
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